Imagine how many definitional problems could be avoided if we weren’t forced to slot into each other in order to procreate. Remember how I didn’t know how to hold you? Standing there in the freezing cold, I wrapped my arms around your chest and told you the funniest thing I’d ever seen. We were facing the same direction, and it was the wrong direction. Using our hands didn’t even cross my mind; I wondered how much an eyebrow ring changes things. The only castle I’d ever live in was 2000 miles away from this sidewalk and it floated in the air. The answer turns out to be a lot more than you’d think.